Not So Much Opposites as Complements!

There is a common saying in regard to people who appear to be "opposites".

Opposites attract!

I think over the years many people have determined that my husband and I seem to epitomize this truth.

My husband is an extrovert, a kind of "rebel". He likes to push the envelope. He's the guy who had the reputation of being "the bad boy on campus" in college to the point he'd take credit for stuff he didn't even do because everyone assumed he did! If there is a group of people of like interests and my husband can be there, he will happily engage in chit-chat, networking and building relationships like nobody's business. He is great at bringing people together. 

Me…I'm an introvert, and a little more on the conservative side. In college I was "that girl who sings". I'm more comfortable in an intimate setting where I can interact one-on-one with a few people and really get to know them. I am naturally drawn to the person in a group who doesn't seem to be engaging with a lot of other people or looks a little lost (generally because I can understand how they feel!).

Fun fact: On the very day we married my husband's mother expressed hope I would be a "calming" influence on her son's often chaotic nature, while my own mother offered her own desire that Thom would help me find a way out of my shell.

I think it's safe to say both those wishes have been accomplished in our lives as individuals and a couple.

My husband and I truly complement one another's natural inclinations. Our strengths and weaknesses are such that we help one another in a very organic way so that we hardly notice any more. Over the years I've learned how to put myself out there and engage with large groups or event situations. Thom has learned when it's time to edit his dry, sarcastic sense of humor. We have both learned how to listen to each other and value one another's opinions. We've also discovered how to take cue's from one another in any given situation and yes we can communicate silently across a crowded room. Not to mention, over the past 21 years we've discovered we actually have much more in common as far as what we think, believe, and desire than most people ever assume possible. 

Personally, I believe God designed marriage to be this way. So many couples find themselves in seemingly "opposite" unions, but rather than embracing and learning from their differences, many couples attempt to change their spouse to be more like them.  Yet the beauty of a marriage is when a man and a woman come together with completely different ways of communicating and approaches to life but find common ground to live, work, play, love, and serve God day by day. 

Opposites really do attract and it's far more common within relationships. In fact, I think those couples who seem to be identical to each other in personality or experience may find many opposites within their relationship if they take a good look. This is the case because people with seemingly disparate personalities or interests complement one another in ways which create a unique bond, uniting them as one, if they are willing to embrace it.

Now it's your turn.

How do you and your spouse complement each other?

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